What a mess

(to be read in a Channel 4 geordie voiceover accent)

Day two in the big brother house. What effect will the new arrival have on the delicate balance of human emotions? Will Ed get up on time? Will he have a hangover? How will that affect his work? Will he do enough to impress the moody genius? Has getting pissed on day one blown his chances of lasting the two weeks? Will he be voted out before he's even begun?

Well in fact (you can revert to normal voice now) he was up on time and raring to go and it's been quite a productive day - so well done Ed. Not that everything went to plan, of course, but we achieved a lot which makes us feel a bit more comfortable about hitting the deadline day of 13th July, when an army of visitors will descend on us for the Bastille Day celebrations the day after. It was so uplifting that the genius was smiling and cracking jokes and being generally happy, which hasn't happened for a while and took me a bit off guard.

So Ed did a good job and it will make a big difference to have him around for a couple of weeks. Sadly, we don't think he is the master at taping and jointing (or drylining, to give it it's professional name) that we hoped we might find, so he may not be the right person to let loose on the unfinished central area of the main appartment. He has also managed to establish in one day a reputation as the absolute messiest builder ever - which is quite an achievement as I've never ever met a tidy builder. There was water everywhere that had previously been dry, there was plaster all over the tools, there was more dropped plaster than on the walls - there was even plaster on the fridge door in the main kitchen, which was quite remarkable. He then committed the cardinal sin of not cleaning up all his tools at the end of the day. I had to have a little word.

I have come to the conclusion that from start to finish, building is not really about the the solid materials used, but more about how many liquid materials you use. At one point today all three of us were scraping some sort of goo onto wall, floor or ceiling as Ed and I continued the skimming and the genius laid floor tiles in the new kitchenette. This whole place is held together with concrete, cement, screed, bonding agents, tile adhesive, grout, glue, mastic, wood filler, oil and paint. Actually, it's pretty impossible not to make a mess, so it's a good job I have a cupboard full of cleaning liquids and lotions to get rid of the residue of the first lot!

Right, I'm off for a shower - more tomorrow I hope.